Something About Lynna

Last night, while exercising, I had the tv on in the background and found myself laughing at a scene in "Something about Mary", a comedy that was produced, what, ten years ago? My laughter turned into dismay, however.

Quick plot overview: Boy likes girl in high school. Girl moves away. Ten years later, boy hires PI to find girl. PI falls for girl (played by the lovely, sprightly Cameron Diaz). In order to pursue the girl for his own, PI lies to boy that girl has gained weight. "Not bad for deuce or deuce fifty." Dismay crosses boys face. PI goes on to say that she uses a wheelchair. Boy's dismay turns into despair. Oh, and she has four kids, never been married, and lives in the projects! The plot line leaves no doubt that the writers of this spoof were seeking a caricature of the worst possible scenario a guy could imagine for the high school prom princess of his youth.

The movie proceeds with the guy overcoming his disgust and pity at the thought of his sweetheart's fate, and he sets out to find her anyhow. He is portrayed as noble. A man of rare valor and depth. A man willing to overlook her porky crippled state with high hopes that he might rescue her.

Hollywood! You got it exactly wrong. This overweight, wheelchair using, very smart, very accomplished, attractive woman says, "Please stop perpetuating the pity party! Please stop with the shallow and untrue portrayal of people with disabilities as pathetic."

Hollywood, you might be unable to see beauty beyond the shallow size 2 botox box, but I'm here to tell you and the world that a 200 pound woman in a wheelchair can be strong, intelligent, sexy, powerful, brave, loving, beautiful and a "catch" for any guy who is smart enough and worthy enough to earn her affection.

Hollywood, you write whatever plot line you want for your silly tales. I'm living my own drama and in it, I am the beautiful heroine. In it I am the prom princess grown up to use a wheelchair and to glide in regal splendor. Hollywood, THAT's an interesting story. Your version... well... just a little boring.

When you're ready to tell a good story, send my agent a proposal.