Saturday, April 9, 2011

Adventures

2011 is the year for saying "yes" to opportunities. (At least the ones that are healthy! "No" is still a good word to remember... not all opportunities must be acted upon, but the ones that are life-giving, even if scary, are gonna get a "yes" from me.)

A couple of interesting opportunities have arisen this past week.
1) I've joined an exercise class! At the first class, I realized that intentionally choosing to move my body in participation with other people has been something I've avoided all my life. The only time I have so engaged was when I was forced to do so (ie gym class) and always with embarrasment and shame that I was so much "less than".

I loved working out with a class full of women... an amazing array of body sizes, shapes, fitness levels, and abilities. All the way from the size 2(?) and obviously fit leader to some significantly overweight ladies and one (that would be me) in a wheelchair.

What was so much fun was the way we all honored each other's journey and recognized that a three-hundred pound woman choosing physical fitness and working for it is something to celebrate... something of great, great value and beauty.

At the first class I attended, when the instructor popped the CD into the player and transitioned from the teaching time to the actual moving part, I felt old anxiety
- residual from those horrific elementary school gym class experiences- bubbling up. Anxiety, shame, embarrasment. In short order, just a manner of minutes, however, I was in the groove and loved moving my body... my amazing and wonderful body... my body not quite as fit as some and not able to do like most... and lovely.

2) Haven't actually done this, but in my heart I've said "yes", so it's coming, probably next week: I'm joining a water exercise class that meets at the Civic Center swimming pool. They have a lift to help mobility-impaired individuals in and out of the pool and handicapped accessible locker rooms. I have a new bathing suit. The planets are aligned. Ahh, chlorine, how I love you. I used to swim laps in college and always loved the chlorine smell... it made me envision Olympic swimmers in swim caps with beautifully muscled shoulders and I always felt strong and lithe after a session in the pool, even if my eyes were bloodshot and aching.

3)And my most daring "yes" to date: I flirted outrageously with an attractive, succesful man and invited him (almost dared him) to hop on a plane and visit my part of the world. We will see what might come of that, but the point is that I had the confidence to reach out for something desirable... and it was deliciously fun.

Loving the adventures...

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